things are lookin up..

and down! ehehe.

everything is so erratic atm. i just want to get my final project finished, to a decent standard, be finished with foundation and get in to pissin st martins.

it's been killin me checkin ucas 3 times a day, every day for what seems like an eternity!

but at the same time, i don't mind waiting cause i'ma be so so gutted if i havent got in. hopefully i'll get the news i want next week.

i love the theme i've chosen for my final major project and i can do so much with it, yet, i havent. i've done diddly fuckin squat and i have 10 days until it has to be in! why do i always do this ! even kept myself up tonight under the rulings that i havehavehave to make some headway - but somehow i have managed to spend an entire night awake finding every irrelevant thing possible to do other than get on with work. work that is not even hard. eeeediot.

things are aite atm. i'm enjoying the gym a lot and gradually gradually making the difference i want aha, no where near as quickly as i'd like. but aaaah well. i have 2 months off soon so i'll just have to go even more often then! - so excited for this summer!!!!!!!! buying my benicassim ticket this weekend. eeeeek! i kinda wanna go to leeds too though.. and lovebox.. and secret garden party. and i wanna go to cornwall with the girls from uni for a few days. daaaaaaaaaaaaym. need a job! wish i had time for one right now :(

i neeed a hair cut. lalalalala.

apologies for my amateur teen pose style picture :) but seriously, my hair is so big and shapeless at the minute. it seriously needs some thinning out and layering. its all different lengths of broken poofyness. ick. also, i think i might have to shave the side of my head again, i don't want to but the stupid short side curls look stupid and if i want it down i have to wear it all to one side like a ghetto kid ;D

ye brah, i put a building on my finger, and wha'?!

ehe, i could be a little more mature with my choice of title but, that just wouldnt be me, ha. i'm so interested in architecturally influenced jewellery atm, been resarching it alot for a current project - i'll have to remember to add the sources tomorrow! i'm beat, peace out + sweet dreamz bro. it's good to be back.

i wanna go travelling..

how fucking beautiful ^

i've only been out of the country once - and that was for a school trip back in year 8 :(
benicassim will have to count as a start aha.

i had a lovely chat with my mama (grandma) tonight, and she banned me from using the word stress ever again, she says i've got it from my mum (SO TRUE) and it's a stupid pathetic word that shouldnt have been invented, 'there's no such thing as stress, we go through things, sometimes they're hard, we just push through them, deal with them in our own way and move on, stress, pffffffffft.' ahahaaha, wise words but she has sucha comical way of saying things! love you more than anything mama dear!!!!!!1

love of my life forevermore..

pah, ed westwick makes me feel like i'm 12 years old crushin on gareth gates again ;D
he's so fucking beautiful! gossip girl is massively depressing at the moment, it makes me angry every week!

fashion hero ;D

on a serious level, the fresh prince is my fashion god!

hanfam..

ahahahaa, this couldnt ring more true for me right now! nice one johnny!
this past few months my appreciation for my friends and family just keeps gettin stronger and stronger. it's a nice feeling. but, i still need a cat ;)

and when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while..

literally..

just been looking through some of the many pictures i have saved on my laptop, there're so many amazing ones of audrey, stalker much!

guess who's got enough money for beni ticket and flight ;D eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek' shame about the line up.

the reason why i'm never around..

stopped dead for a moment when i saw this! one of my favourite rebloggs ever in all honesty. those shoes :O i wish i could pull off that hair colour with my skin tone - or baby pink!!!! could nicky minaj it up i guess, pah.

my tumblr; http://beautifulhappeningss.tumblr.com/ alot more regularly updated, my blogspots very neglected lately. tumblrs just so easy!!!!!!!!

old skool.

me and my brother about 5 years back, one of my fave pictures everrrrr. he's sucha gorm in it :') it saddens me that hes not the baby anymore ha, he often sounds more mature than me these days!

so, i changed my blog up a little..

i just wasn't really feeling it..

i'm gonna be less emotional and moany on my blog from now on and try to post more regularly!
but for now, i should definitely be going to sleep so i'm just gonna write a few of my new years resolutions/ the top 10 on my sort my life out list aha..

- get cracking with my portfolio pronto;
- get onto degree level!

- lose weight, by sticking to the gym and eating right for more than a couple days
- worry and stress far far less
- find a way to communicate and sort things out with my mother

- get a job, PRONTO!
- go to benicassim this year! and possibly secret garden party?
- keep my flat tidy and be more organised
- quit the erratic sleeping patterns

- be happy!

mmm-mmm.

Daisy Lowe for UK esquire HD from Greg Williams on Publish Postvimeo.com">Vimeo.

oh god, made in chelsea christmas special was SO amazing tonight! eeeeeek.

.

been doing some stop motion stuff for uni research.

so focused.

some stuff i shot the other night for my current uni project.
i've been doing so much work this week, and actually enjoying it!

why do i always do this..

want that ^ can't remember where i got the image from though :(
omgsh, so stressed. did more or less no work last week and now have insane amounts to do across the weekend and the next couple weeks fuck.
plus, ive missed loads of jewellery events this weekend that i knew were happening but i couldn't be arsed to check the details of them, it's not like i've done anything worth while instead :| could've got so many pages of research for my portfolio so i am seriously annoyed. gonna have to go tomorrow and i've also found a few events on early this week and a possible internship i could apply for! need to get my arse into gear so badly.
anyway, i'll stop babbling, cause my blog is becoming unreadable aha, it's like a boring journal. another thing on my list of things to do is to sort my blog out! anyway, off to jewellery class, will return later with something hopefully more exciting and positive to post :)

can't get m83's new album out of my head

this is hilarious! me and my best friend often have to discussion about the whole 'hipster' cliché, pretentious wanker epidemic that seems to be huge at the moment.
i like to joke that she ticks every box, which she does. but she doesn't so much approve of my joking :) love you han.

so, yesterday, i had a proper nights sleep for the first time in a couple of weeks, may sound pretty uninteresting but i was so excited to be tired at half 11 last night and able to naturally wake up at 6 this morning, my sleeping patterns have been so all over the place as of late, it's just a constant intense tiredness that has been getting in the way of everything i need to do with my days. aaahhh, happy to have that hurdle jumped anyway.
things are still looking pretty good, i'm still feeling focused but definitely need to crack on a little bit the next week or two. i got my personal statement first draft done which is brilliant and means i can send off my UCAS application soon :) which is just as nerve wracking as as relieving. i'm trying so hard not to put all my hopes into getting into CSM but it's definitely the course i feel is right. workworkwork, portfolioportfolioportfolio is all i can really think at the moment :)
my jewellery classes are going really well!

currently debating whether to start a new blog for my jewellery progress and inspiration or to just start to make this one more focused and professional. ummmmaaaa..


source; theselby

happy sigh.

i'm very content at the moment, i feel like i've grown up so much the past few weeks/ months.

eeeek.

found via; lefashionimage.blogspot.com

extremely shortened wishlist.

just a few things i desperately want at the moment, SO tempted to use a bit of my overdraft, but i know i need it for important things only. surely things that lovely are definite necessities?! :D
honest to god so in love with justacces, probably my best find this year so far!!!!!!!!

armour ring - justacces by just female dress by motel via nastygal, shoes deena & ozzy @ urbn.

i want M-83 and Drake's new albums

retail truly is thereapeutic..

but it only relieves the stress momentarily..

got the most amazing new ring from topshop today, literally in love. it's by just acces, the accesories line stemmed from 'just female' a danish fashion label.

i was in love with the whole stand in topshop and wanted to buy every item. but with the expensive commision prices, i figured a £15 double chain ring and a £12 ear cuff was probably a good place to stop. definitely gonna go back when i have more money though, maybe to treat myself as some sorta insentive.
i seriously need to get my act together, i know that if i put my mind to it, more or less instantly then i will be able to focus and succeed, however if i don't then i am heading down my classic road of self sabbotage and i will end up letting myself down completely.
i need to; get on top of my jewellery portfolio, make some serious headway in my research and design, get my personal statement finalised and checked by LS, reaed to be checked my jewellery tutor. get project 2 completely finished! to do so; get shoots done this week! one after the other, get illustrations done tomorrow and in the evenings. get ALL research in place and onto the blog for project 3 ready to focus on across the weekend and end of the week and also get a step by step plan of completeion sorted for project 1. start to compelte one drawing assignment per day/ three per weekend, thouroughly until completed! sort out gym membership and start attending everyday plus atleast 3 classes, fix my cv and hand out everywhere, apply to jewellery jobs, sort out glass workshop placement! continue attending lifedrawing, keep room and work space tidy, so that i can keep my brain tidy. eat healthily, keep on top of vitamins and allergies, healthy meals, healthy snacks, cut out junk for the whole month. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! fuck. and most importantly.. breath!
so, this is dull, my blog seems to have momentarily become a journal/ to do list. atleast i now have my aims typed out so i can check in and cross them off mentally as i go. can't wait to have an empty to do list and a feeling a relief and accomplishment. gonna take a lot of all nighters to get me there i reckon.

on a bright a note, i got an amazing burnt orange chunky scarf today! in love.

and, once again, i'm still up when the birds have started to sing. FUCK.